If you have confidence, winning new friends becomes easy. In fact, it will attract people almost automatically. People love others who exude confidence. Think about the people you work with. Do you tend to naturally migrate towards confident people?
It’s important not to take your confidence too far where you are looked upon as being arrogant. This has the potential to turn people off more than win any friendships. Overconfident people are seen as unwavering and others tend to avoid these types. It’s not necessary either. The key is to be yourself without stepping on others.
Believing in yourself is the first step towards gaining confidence. Everyone has some amount of self-doubt but you need to get over it. Start by observing others who you feel are confident. What qualities do they possess? Do they talk about themselves or do you find them talking about others in a positive way? Do others get excited when those confident people enter the room?
Sometimes, confidence comes from learning new skills. If you know what others don’t, people will come to you when they learn you have those skills or knowledge. But, don’t stop at just a cursory level of knowledge. Become an expert and you will have the confidence necessary when people do approach you. It’s okay not to know everything at the beginning, don’t pretend as you do. But, as long as you continue on the path of learning more, it will serve you well.
Confidence also comes from knowing the strength of others and using it to help them as well as you. If you are part of a team, get to know what others are good at on your team. Then, when you come across those attributes in your job, you can rely on their expertise. They will appreciate you for recognizing their abilities.
Help others who are not good at something but show a willingness to learn. These people will become allies, and they too will appreciate your efforts to help. They will become part of your network and will talk you up to others.
Friendship will happen when you gain confidence in your life and work. It will seem effortless and you will end up with more friends than you know what to do with. That is certainly a better problem to have than having no friends at all. Don’t be surprised if you get approached by unknown people saying that your friends have recommended you.